Dear Jenny,
Did you watch last night's Top Design? I think I did, but I'm not sure. It's possible Bravo aired a one-hour infomercial for some crappy SUV instead. Actually, wait. I saw my show, but I can't think now . . . my head hurts, and I'm pretty sure I want to work at the Container Store.
Seriously, I feel like Bravo is breaking new grounds in product placement and it's really distracting me from their otherwise awesome shows. (Well, except Work Out or whatever sucks, and I can't even look at The Real Housewives of Douchebag County.) How much are they really getting from GM to shill their products, week after week, and at what cost to us, the viewers? I don't think this transaction balances out. Anyway, in honor of Bravo, today's commentary will include three (pro bono) product endorsements. Look out for them!
Somewhere in there was a challenge, though. The designers had to remodel a garage for the Bell family, or, as I thought of them, Mr and Mrs Joely Richardson. It was a weird team assignment where the lead designer (Andrea) was somehow exempt and also got to talk smack with the judges about the other designers. I like Andrea (although I wish she would maybe see a different colorist or upgrade to Feria) but feel that maybe this reward was wasted on her. Can you imagine if Michael or Carisa had had a chance to dish with Jonathan, Kelly and Margaret?
Then deliberation . . . one of the highlights of Top Design, for me, is the amount of malice exhibited by the judges, particularly Margaret Russell, who spares no one, not even fellow judge Kelly Wearstler. I find that I've already stolen some mannerisms from Jonathan Adler, without meaning to. For instance, I now do his doleful scrunchy face to punctuate statements like "The Starbuck's at M and 25th in Washington, DC smells so awful I literally vomited on the sidewalk outside."
Then for once, the right person went home, maybe for the wrong reasons, or . . . I don't know. This was such a dumb challenge, but I don't even care anymore. I just want a Fresca.
Next week, it looks like we're going to have conflict involving Goil. I don't know if I can watch.
Love,
-- Pete
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